I'm trapped between the priorities of my mind and heart.  I went with my heart in a massive way for the first time this year at the cost of my degree, and parents faith in me.  I now have a few weeks (extension given to me due to diagnosis of ADHD) to finish the written work of incomplete modules. (my only complete module was my graduation short film which I willingly devoted my life to for months at the cost of all other university work).  But I've come alive through following my heart; the thought of wasting another day grabs me by the throat and hurls me towards life before this journey began...a wonderful, charming life it was, but I wasn't really living it.

But, I'm no brat...

spoilt, yes...ungrateful, no...selfish...in many ways, but in many ways not-Which are more important?

No jobs for a misled, mis-educated generation.

According to the Wall Street Journal, hundreds of thousands of new college graduates are entering a U.S. work force that has no use for them. While two million college grads remain unemployed, kids with $200k educations get to compete for jobs waiting and busing tables, delivering pizzas, serving as bouncers at night clubs and baristas at Starbucks. Those who've gone the distance to earn Ivy League law degrees may be joining other Ivy League law grads working as census takers, file clerks, and substitute teachers. Sorry Class of 2010, nobody wants you.

If you're a recent college grad, you've likely spent your entire academic life training to be irrelevant in our new economy. Not only that but you're likely to be tens if not hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt for an "education" whose economic bubble just burst.

There seems to be a consensus among the Doctors, that I have an overvalued idea. I am more interested in this characteristic as it is a symptom of some “thought disorder”.  

An Overvalued Idea is a non-delusional, non-obsessional, abnormal belief which is in itself acceptable and comprehensible but which is preoccupying and comes to dominate their thinking and behavior.  The idea is not perceived as “external’ or ‘senseless’ but will generally have great significance to the patient.  Overvalued Ideas may have a variety of contents in different disorders (concern over physical appearance in dysmorphophobia, concern over weight and body shape in anorexia nervosa, concern over personal right in paranoid Personality disorder).

They say for the Law of Attraction to really work in your favour, you need to align your unconscious expectations with your conscious mind.  This can be really difficult when your consciously trying to find employment, but your unconscious has a deep desire to create massive change in the universe.

Trying very hard to let go of the need to know what's going to happen in any given situation - that human/ego craving for security, is the very thing that's blocking my progress to progress.  When I'm in the vibration of needing things to happen, I'm in a state of vibrational blockage from that very thing that I'm after.  Training the brain to let go of control and just to allow events to happen is one of the hardest things to learn.  As much as I want to bring my precognitive visions to life, I still have the energy blockage of 'lack of money' burning my vibratory flow. 

I shut down my business the end of February and gotta say I'm starting to miss it.  I haven't been sitting around doing nothing, I've actually been very busy, but it's the intangibles about business that I'm missing.  The banter with customers, the rush from closing the big deal and the thrill of uncertainty are not a part of my everyday life anymore.

I'm also missing the money but I'm not too concerned about that.  Money comes and money goes.  It's all over the place.  It changes hands billions of times per second.  I just want to make sure it passes through my hands every once in awhile.